So much has happened already this year, which just so happens to be the year that I turn 60. I hardly know where to begin…if you have read my posts over time, you know I have been struggling with direction for some time now. The life changes have been so numerous and monumental that I have felt BEYOND disoriented. I don’t respond well to feeling lost, and yet that is where I find myself most of the time.
Discovering Kathy Taylor and Studio 6020 was a game changer. I began to see that feeling lost is really part of the gift and the assignment, (my part) is to show up, immerse myself in the chaos, and commit, until direction finally begins to show itself. Each time I do, and have the grit to endure the excruciating confusion…magic happens, (at least it feels magical to me).
“True Nature” was just completed. Why does a woman who lives in Phoenix paint penguins? Good question…
In January, Kathy had us create vision boards, our hopes and dreams for 2017. There were stacks of magazines from which to choose photos and I found myself attracted to penguins. Looking up their symbolism, I found they represent 1) new ways of seeing things, 2) a quantum leap of trust, 2) love and commitment, 3) strength and fortitude. If I could order from a menu, these are the items I would choose!!
Last year right before I (literally) stumbled into Kathy’s new studio by accident, there was a frightening incident with a dog bite, an injury to my right hand, see “Bruised Reed” (warning…graphic). I now believe that was an opportunity to begin expressing in a whole new way.
In March of this year, a cat tore open my LEFT wrist and after the initial shock, I quickly intuited that it is an opportunity to RECEIVE inspiration in a new way.
Simultaneously, I have been working with various teachers and healers to integrate wounds of the past, forgive myself and others, as well as sharpen my intuition. Some of the gifts received are…a growing appreciation for the art I have already created, a (hesitant) willingness to surrender to the void and birth “what wants to be brought forth”, a growing resonance with Egyptian history, a stronger commitment to my “True Nature” and to revealing it consistently.
The painting is of a penguin family; the love, strength and commitment are palpable. I have collaged Egyptian script into the piece, along with butterflies that came to me as tissue paper wrapped around art supplies. Butterflies (of course) for transformation, and the knowledge that between the caterpillar and butterfly forms, there is a time spent in chrysalis soup, where formlessness is required. The painting is filled with personal truth, a willingness to be vulnerable, wrong, and to keep showing up when I feel lost and confused, with self-compassion, knowing that magic will unfold. I know the same will be true for you, as you navigate these challenging times of metamorphosis.